Off-mute chewer – Chews on (lunch?) audibly into the microphone.
Absent-minded mute button user – Starts responding with the mute button on for about a minute or more before realizing that no one is hearing the response.
Mute button blamer – Wasn’t paying attention. Â Had to have name called several times. Â Blames mute button for not having a clue what’s going on. Â See also: Â How the Mute Button on Your Phone Actually Works
Clock Watcher – Spends more time checking watch that actually participating in meeting.
Filibusterer – Single handedly talks the meeting into oblivion. Â Not to be confused with the derailer or rambler.
Derailer – Somehow manages to bring up tangential topics that get everyone completely off topic for the next 15 minutes.
Rambler – Responds to any question with a barely intelligible introspection on the topic. Â Responses to follow-up questions for clarification grow at an exponential rate.
Hedger – Treats every remote possibility as likely and stays non-commital unless you accept the exceptions noted.
Overhead speaker – Not an actual attendee or person, but an object which causes an echo in speakerphones and disrupts the meeting until it becomes silent again.
Tattle-tale – At the first of not getting his or her way, threatens to go tell a more powerful person to whom the tattler is connected.
Foot propper – The meeting is a lounge to this person: Â Feet are propped up on the table and behaves generally too relaxed to actually be engaged in the meeting.
Multitasker – Furiously typing on the keyboard, but obviously not to take notes on the meeting. Â Don’t bother asking this person questions unless you want to rehash the entire meeting.
Referee – “Sees the merits of both sides” of an intense debate. Â Tries to make everybody play nice, regardless of their agendas.
Idea killer – Always has a negative scenario for any proposal. Â Never has an idea himself.
Yes man – Would say no pants Friday at the office was a good idea, provided the right person proposed it.
Interrupter – Jumps in mid-details and often freaks out about half the story or asks questions whose answers were already on their way.
Belittler – Often pulls rank or “experience” to shut other people off.
Saboteur – Is either annoyed at the assignment or annoyed at not getting the project lead, but plays nice during the meeting, silently plotting the slow death of the project. Â Can also accomplish goals as an inciter.
Inciter – May jump communication chains to create the illusion of one person hiding information from another.