Grumpy Coworker

  • The overhead speaker / paging system

    In an office environment where everyone has cubes with their own phones, cell phones, and laptops, how often is there a reason for someone to be paged?  I’d imagine in the case of life or death, or birth, use of the paging system is valid.  For all other purposes, if it’s going to be moderately important that you be reached in a timely manner when away from your desk, the person likely to need to reach you should have your cell phone on you.

    More annoying still is the use of the paging system to make announcements constantly. I may not be at the XYZ event because I don’t care about it.  Just a thought.  I really don’t want to have an announcement made unless you would feel comfortable dialing 911 in response to whatever you’re making an announcement about.

    Would you use the fire alarm if there were doughnuts in the break room?  Okay, maybe I’ll make an exception for doughnuts.

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  • Oh the noise… Cell phone ringers

    Ah, I remember when a digital beep pattern was the norm for the cell phone. Then, cell phones started coming with preprogrammed “tunes”, that were just a variation on that beep pattern.

    At various points in time, using a voice recording, midi, or music file for a phone ringer were all novel. Occasionally, some fun or catchy sound or song comes along, and we are tempted to use it as our full time ringer. Unfortunately, the company is not paying you to amuse or entertain us, the coworkers. Maybe if you’re a comedian, clown, musician, you entertain patrons or clients–but I doubt those people resort to ringtones.

    Besides, “Gold Digger” and “I Kissed a Girl” ringtones make things awkward. Use a plain ringer and turn it down or put it on vibrate. Otherwise, I’m going to have to go Office Space on your phone.

  • Hand Washing, Urinals, and Toilets

    A person washing their hands with soap and water.
    Hand Washing from Crestock Stock Photos

    Maybe your use of a urinal made it possible to do your business “hands-free”.

    The rest of us would still like you at least to go through the motions of good hygiene for our peace of mind.

    Also, if you had to sit on the toilet, it’s unlikely that your hands didn’t do any dirty work. Stop kidding yourself.

  • Grooming is wonderful

    That doesn’t mean that your cubicle is an ideal place for it.

    *Clip*

    *Clip*

    *Clip*

    Please stop now.

  • Sandals at work

    Last time I checked, the dress code didn’t include open-toed shoes for men.

    I really don’t want to see your toes, no matter how much you spent on a pedicure.